Growing up in a country with a reputation as bad as Germany’s in regards to war is tough.  You learn about WWI and WWII just about every other year in history class, you get to visit former concentration camps, and you go to any holocaust exhibition near where you live.  You get it rammed into your head that Germans did bad things, that they killed millions of people for no real reason at all, and that you have to do all you can to make sure that history never repeats itself.  I didn’t grow up being patriotic and even today I have a hard time saying or writing that I am proud to be German (or, now that I have the American citizenship, that I am proud to be from Germany.  I have no problem to say that I am proud to be from Berlin – but the words pride and German together just don’t feel right – they always make a somewhat uncomfortable feeling creep up, because those two words together always bring up pictures of Germans in Nazi uniforms, of the mass graves in the former concentration camps that I saw, and of all the horror that has been shown on TV and in museums.  Even waving a German flag during a game of the National soccer team felt wrong – a shame actually.  So when Germany was asked to enter the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, Germans were hesitant to do so, because there was a fear and believe that if anything goes wrong, other nations will find some way to blame Germany for it.  Germans did not support Germany’s involvement in those wars — but it was expected. 

During the last days I have followed news coverage of two German officials resigning because of air-strikes in September in Afghanistan. 

BERLIN — The German military’s top official was removed Thursday for failing to properly pass on information to political leaders about a September air-strike in Afghanistan that killed civilians.

The new defense minister, Karl-Theodor zu Guttenberg, told parliament that the military’s inspector general, Gen. Wolfgang Schneiderhan – the equivalent of chief of staff – had asked to be relieved of his duties.

That came after Germany’s top-selling Bild newspaper published what it said were still captures from confidential videos of the incident. Peter Wichert, a deputy defense minister who was in office at the time of the air-strike, also stepped down.

I was very ambivalent myself about Germany’s participation in the war.  I still am.  But I believe that Germany’s history makes it even more difficult.  Germany is bound to lose support of their citizens if the reports are made available, because Germans don’t want to read about Germany military having conducted air-strikes that caused deaths – but not reporting about it is bound to backfire as well – as is the case here.  German officials and the German military are caught between a rock and a hard place – no matter which way they turn, there is bound to be criticism from the citizens.  But withdrawing and not participating in the war will lead to criticism from the other nations that are expecting Germany to share toe cost and manpower needed. 

 I believe that participation will force Germany to deal with the past in a new and different way – and to carve out its place in conflicts around the world. I look forward to seing the results of this inner struggle

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